The Book of Eli

If you haven't seen the movie - you might not want to read on. (pausing for you to decide) ((pause over)) I knew throughout the movie that Denzel Washington - who may I say is one fine looking man! It is something about his carriage, the way he walks, so confident without arrogance - Mrs. Cotson, one of my former teaching assistants goes to church with Denzel, she won't tell me where her church is because she thinks I will show up there and embarrass her by gushing all over Mr. Washington - I wouldn't do that; I just want to stand close to him - I bet he smells good. Anyway, Eli, Denzel Washington's character, is blind, however, they don't let you know this - if you pay close attention you may pick up on some subtle hints, very subtle - Eli has a copy of the bible, God spoke to him, after the "Big Flash" and told him to go West. So Eli has spent 30 years walking! Over those thirty years he has read "The Book" every day. I enjoy a movie which leaves me with more questions than answers - If, after the "Big Flash" God asked me to carry The Bible and walk West until I found where The Bible should end up would I be able to do it? Along the way Eli comes into contact with a character I reckon is the anti-Christ (should that be capitalized?) This character was interesting - he knew if he had The Bible, The Word, then people from all over would come to follow him, he would have all power - he could build a new society and he would have control - See, I contend that The Bible is a history book - it has some truth and some perception of truth - as with all history books there are errors of omission and errors of perception - If I were to take the word at it's literal value then my whole existence is pointless - no matter what I do I am doomed to hell - I don't believe in hell - Do I not believe in it because I don't want to believe I am doomed to end up there? Yesterday I went to church. The pastor spoke of how each of us battles discouragement, how the devil will get at us with discouragement and low self esteem - if he can't get us all with jealousy, or greed, or anger - sooner or later we all have a bout with discouragement - that is true! Any given day we fight discouragement. I have prayed for one thing in particular a good many years and yet it has not come to pass - this is discouraging! The Pastor then said that we need not hold this discouragement because God has made me exactly as he wants me, he has made me just as I am to be, he has made me in his image so I am perfect - perfect is a stretch, a big stretch, I do believe God makes us in his image - he made me, I did not choose to be a lesbian - I was born this way - if I had my druthers I would have chosen different(seriously, who would make a conscious choice to be cast out, damned, different, spat on, marginalized?) - It wasn't my choice, so I am doomed to hell for being this person whom God himself created? No way! I can't believe that! I can't believe I have lived my life trying as best I could to do the best I can - I have accepted every cross God has asked me to bear, I have given forgiveness and begged for forgiveness - Those who know me, you know I have risen above...a lot! I have a long way to go and I work every day trying to be a better person. I search my soul every day seeking a better path. In my decision making, I truly think of others and I do ask myself; "What would Jesus do?" The other interesting line in the movie comes when Eli must choose between giving the Bible to the anti-Christ or allowing someone to die. Eli gives up the Bible. When the woman he saved asks why he gave up the book he replies; "I spent so many years reading the book, and carrying it West, I forgot to live by what the book was teaching me." This really struck me. How often have people who claim to be religious fallen from their self-made pedestals. Fallen hard, yet, the average person - living a good honest life is overlooked. Those ten people who were killed in Afghanistan last week, they refused to denounce Jesus Christ, and they were killed. They would have been killed no matter what they said - but they remained true to their faith - that takes a lot of courage! Could you do it? Often I have said I live the way I do because I don't want to get to the end of my journey and have been wrong - some people don't believe in heaven - I do, and I believe when I get there it will be such a joyous day! No, I don't believe in hell - I believe we have to make peace here on this Earth, and when we do this - when we find that knowledge and acceptance of God then we go to heaven - What of those who never believe? They go to school. They go to school until they get it and then they can come to heaven. Purgatory, that is what they call it - I have a hard time with the notion that the devil pushes us into bad choices - "The devil made me do it." That sounds like a cop-out! If the devil makes people do bad things then we should sentence them to 20 years of church and bible study instead of 20 years in prison - And we both know all the praying in the world has never paid the rent. God provides for us, but we have to get off the couch and do the work. And what of those prayers which are not answered? We are to learn something from them, I know that, yet - it is sometimes really hard when what you are praying for is important - really important - when you are praying for someone else who so deserves a break...During church yesterday I talked to God about this quandary - begged him to change his mind and bring forth just one break - I don't know what he will do - I sat in that church, crying, listening to the music - begging God for this one thing - If God asked me to walk for thirty years, read The Bible everyday, fight thine enemies - I would start walking right now. With a gun in my face I would pray, until my last breath I would pray. The irony in the movie is this; after the big flash most people were left blind - Eli was blind before the big flash so he could read Braille - his Bible was written in Braille; the anti-Christ's kept woman was also blind before the big flash - when he, the bad guy, told her to read the bible, she would not do it - The blind shall see! The two people who were blind saw the most; and the sighted had no vision at all. Reckon we see this every day of our lives. What would you do? Not everyone holds the same religious beliefs, and some don't hold any. Most of us believe in some higher power - most of us hold onto some kind of faith, goodness, given the state of the world today we could use a lot more faith. Faith is sometimes the only thing which gets me through the day - and when I pray and pray and that prayer appears unanswered, I look deeper, because I know there is something there I am not seeing - the sighted have less vision - seek the quiet and listen for the answer; but what if that is not the answer I want - Oh I know then the answer I receive is what I need - I know, but that is a tough one isn't it. My prayer is not for me! What I ask for is not for me - my whole heart wants this for someone I love - maybe if y'all helped me a bit - ask whatever higher power you believe in to listen to Lisa's prayer; and maybe we can collectively make it come true - I do believe in people; I believe we are born good and too often circumstance really throws us a curve ball and it pushes us in directions which are murky and then we make bad choices - the people I encounter with "empty eyes" these people have had their spirit just beaten out of them - by life, by the actions of others - however, we can all rise above circumstance - and we choose our behavior - we can't choose how we feel but we do choose how we behave. I also believe it is just fine to sit down and cry and beg the question "why?" Of course I also believe you get back up, dry your eyes and get on with life. It is a precious gift - everyday, every person, every moment - don't have time to waste it! Celebrate Life! Tell those you love how you feel, do what you need - be kind to every person - being nice is not that hard - Oh sure, inside you might just want to knock some one up side the head, but don't-smile and walk away; it will feel good - really - it will!